Monday, August 07, 2006

I have a dilemma, OR The one about killer dolls.

Last Christmas, my MIL gave the following doll to Cherry:

I have to admit, that the picture doesn't truely capture the problem, but let me tell you: THIS IS ONE UGLY DOLL. And there are some significant problems with her. She's supposed to be a "newborn" doll, however she can sit on her own, and she is VERY fat. Her body is filled with beans and some sort of other stuffing and her butt is three times the size of her head. Her face is creepy too. Armondo doesn't like it either. It's just plain.... wrong.

And when I switched Cherry into her "big girl" room, I didn't move this doll into her new room. I just couldn't bring myself to find a spot for it. I mean, LOOK AT IT! Isn't it creeping you out? How can I be a good mother and stick that scary, ugly doll into my small child's room?

Anyway, the other day when the MIL came to visit, I made sure that I pulled the doll out of the old room so that it was "around" if MIL looked for it. Well, she saw it lying on the floor, picked it up and said in an adoring voice "Oh, I love this doll so much! She's so cute!"

It was very hard for me to keep my mouth shut.

So here's the dilema: Do I keep the doll and put it in Cherry's new room?
Do I pack the doll up and store it somewhere, and hope and pray that it doesn't pop out one day and pull a "Chucky"?
Or do I send it to the Sally Anne and hope that my MIL won't notice?

I've had a similar dilema before.

My mother had a doll when she was a child, that was passed down for me to play with when I was a child. The doll had been stored at my grandmother's house for years, and she wanted to get rid of it, so a few years ago, she gave it to me. The doll had sat at the bottom of the basement stairs at my grandmother's house, and everytime I turned on the light in the stairwell and saw that naked doll at the foot of the stairs, it gave me a bit of a start. I didn't think it would be that bad if I put some clothes on her and put her in a less startling location, but I was wrong.

The doll was one of those "Walking Doll"s, but the mechanical inards had long worn out. She was missing a finger from the days when my mother played with her, and her hair was sparse and felt gross. And she was life size. And everytime I walked passed the room she sat in, she'd creep me out with her shiny blue eyes and sinister stare. My room mates were scared of her too, but I kept her around for several years. I tried to make her seem less creepy by giving her a wig to wear, which, I have to admit, DID help a little, but still that missing finger and weird eyes scared me. I had the option of storing her in a closet, but again, I was afraid that she'd come alive and kill me in the middle of the night. I figured that if I kept her in plain site, that she'd be less likely to try something. I wish I could say that I am joking, but really, I'm not.

I had to do something with her, she couldn't just stay in the spare room and haunt it. I had become pregnant with Cherry, and I knew that I didn't want that doll around my future children. So, I asked my grandmother if she wanted it back. She didn't. I was still talking to my mother at the time, so I asked her if SHE wanted it back. She did. But I never saw my mother again after that conversation and my due date was fast approaching. So, I got up my nerve and months later, I took the old doll to the Sally Anne*.

And now, I imagine, she haunts someone else. Better them than us though!

So, what to do with the new, creepy doll? Part of the problem is that I'm worried that my own, creeped out feelings will be apparent to Cherry, and that she'll become scared of it simply because I am. And, as I'm writing this, I can feel the doll LOOKING at me.. I mean, she's RIGHT THERE, off to the side, contemplating the easiest way to get the knives off the wall. I know she is. HELP ME!

*The Sally Anne is the Salvation Army thrift store, in case you didn't know.


TT said...

I say ditch the doll! Ya, it's freaky. Does Cherry like the doll? If not, then you really have nothing to lose. If she does, then I guess you'll have to keep it around for a while until she grows out of it and isn't interested anymore. Your MIL isn't going to notice it is gone if it's not there. YOU CAN'T KEEP EVERYTHING PEOPLE GIVE YOU!

Anonymous said...

i'm with teacher teen! if cherry likes it, you might need to keep it. otherwise, she has lots of other toys to enjoy.


Belinda said...

Who is Sally Anne? Now I'm askeered of HER! Bella has a similar newborn, can't remember the name, but they're really popular. Baby Chou Chou, or something? It looks and feels very realistic, and she LOVES it. I was never a doll kid, though.

And now, thanks to you, I remember those creepy giant walking dolls, and I must hate you for a little while of reminding me of them.

debambam said...

OH yeah, ditch the doll. Get rid of it. Plead ignorance if ever asked about it. Left it at a restaurant, the dog was scared of it and ate it. Santa took it at christmas time to give to a naughtuy kid.....!!!

Mr. Fabulous said...

Please, for the love of God, get it out of the house! Get it out of the house!

I am very scared for you.

Evan said...

MMMM I Haven't thought of Bride of Chucky for such a long time!

That thing is seriously demented. I'd call some sort of excorcist.

Melora said...

I don't really see the horror star in that doll, Cece. Sure, she's not particularly cute, but that is because they are trying to suggest "newborn" by having a smushed up, unsmiling face instead of a frail, stick-like body. Unless you are letting Cherry watch Chuckie movies (and I know you aren't), she won't have the same associations. Katie has several baby dolls which I find extremely homely, but which she dearly loves. Unless you think your MIL really wouldn't notice the missing doll (in which case, go ahead and get rid of it), I'd keep it around until Cherry is of an age to have real preferences in her dolls. Normally, I'm in favor of getting rid of stuff you don't really like, but in the case of a gift from MIL, I'd err on the side of pleasing her.

K. said...

I say keep her. In the pic she looks cute. Unless of course, Cherry is scared of her too??

Cherrypie said...

I've always been scared of dolls, particularly lifesize walking ones. Burn it!