My Dad gave me some (very) late birthday money a couple of months ago and I went out and bought a sewing machine.
I LOVE IT.
Sew far, I've sewn the bodies of three sock monkeys, and half of a Barbie sleeping bag. In fact, that's what I'm working on right now. For some reason, I promised Cherry that I would make her some Barbie blankets if she agreed to stop using WIPES for blankets. And I told her they'd be done for her in the morning.
I am stupid.
Back to work! I'll post photos of my simple sewing projects once they're finished!
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Friday, November 02, 2007
We Goin' to Seep Land?
For the past couple of years, Armondo and I have been discussing buying a new bed. When we first moved in together, we didn't really think we needed a new bed. I brought a nice, newish double into the relationship, and he brought a gross old single futon into the relationship, so my bed seemed much nicer than what he was used to, and pretty adequate for what we needed.
As time went by, we started discussing how much better a Queen size bed would be, but we've been thinking of moving (including putting our house on the market awhile ago) for a couple of years now, and we've been thinking of holding off buying a new bed until we were in our bigger dream house. Part of the reason for waiting is that we didn't want to get rid of our current bed, and there's no room to store it at our current house.
Long story shorter, TODAY WE BOUGHT A NEW BED! We don't actually get it delivered until Tuesday, but wow! it's so exciting!
We went on Wednesday to look at beds, with the kids in tow, all of us dressed as cow folk, and Cherry had the best time jumping on the beds and leaping from bed to bed. We told her we were at "Sleep Country" and since then she had been asking to go back to "Seep Land". She was just beside herself when we arrived again today at Seep Land, and had a blast playing with the moving beds, as well as hiding under the covers of the made bed.
When the time came to leave, Cherry called out "Tank you! See you soon! See you tomorrow!"
Then, tonight, while we were cuddling at bed time, she told me she was going to dream about Seepy land. Seems appropriate!
As time went by, we started discussing how much better a Queen size bed would be, but we've been thinking of moving (including putting our house on the market awhile ago) for a couple of years now, and we've been thinking of holding off buying a new bed until we were in our bigger dream house. Part of the reason for waiting is that we didn't want to get rid of our current bed, and there's no room to store it at our current house.
Long story shorter, TODAY WE BOUGHT A NEW BED! We don't actually get it delivered until Tuesday, but wow! it's so exciting!
We went on Wednesday to look at beds, with the kids in tow, all of us dressed as cow folk, and Cherry had the best time jumping on the beds and leaping from bed to bed. We told her we were at "Sleep Country" and since then she had been asking to go back to "Seep Land". She was just beside herself when we arrived again today at Seep Land, and had a blast playing with the moving beds, as well as hiding under the covers of the made bed.
When the time came to leave, Cherry called out "Tank you! See you soon! See you tomorrow!"
Then, tonight, while we were cuddling at bed time, she told me she was going to dream about Seepy land. Seems appropriate!
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Hallowe'en
Howdy, Y'all. We had a great time yesterday being cow folk. We went to play group in the morning and did the trick or treating in the mall in the evening. It was actually pretty mellow, as Cherry isn't nearly as crazy as last year, and made sure she was holding hands with us the whole time she collected her candy. Peach just hung out in her stroller and watched all the crazy kids run around. (But I made sure we got a few treats for "her" when I saw there was good ones being handed out. I'm so bad.)
Cherry ran around playgroup all day holding ponies. How appropriate!
Cherry ran around playgroup all day holding ponies. How appropriate!
Peach pretty much just hung out and looked cute all morning at playgroup.
Armondo specially trimmed his facial hair for the occasion. What a trooper! You can't ever accuse this family of not being fun!
It's November, YAY!
So, it's time for "Write a post every day of November, no matter how boring month."
I figure this will be a great kick in the butt for me to start blogging regularly again! Whoop! I know you're excited!
Click Here
Click Here
And Somehow over the past few months, I've lost all my fancy clicky knowledge I once had, so you're going to have to click on the "click here"s instead of on the actual little buttons. I totally suck!
I figure this will be a great kick in the butt for me to start blogging regularly again! Whoop! I know you're excited!
Click Here
Click Here
And Somehow over the past few months, I've lost all my fancy clicky knowledge I once had, so you're going to have to click on the "click here"s instead of on the actual little buttons. I totally suck!
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
I Really Shouldn't Be Upset About This,
This evening, I went to the grocery store with my two daughters. When we go out, we (they) always get a lot of attention. And tonight wasn't any different.
As soon as we walked through the door, the greeter started telling my girls how beautiful they were. This old grandfatherly type of guy went on to ask Cherry about her Hallowe'en costume and sort of kept the girls engaged while I waited to use the bank machine. (It wasn't creepy in the slightest, just so that's clear.)
And then, throughout the store, other customers would say "hi" and tell them they were cute and or beautiful, etc.
Then, this one man came up to the kids and started talking to Peach. He was asking her how she was, and telling me how beautiful my baby was, and how "good" my baby was. During all this time, Cherry was saying "Hi! I'm (insert real name here)!" and was trying to get his attention too. He was completely ignoring Cherry. She's sort of use to this, because Peach is the BABY, so she gets a little more attention, but in general, the person doing the gawking will turn to pay attention to Cherry after a few seconds. Well, not in this case. The man didn't turn towards my sweet pigtailed little girl who was dying for attention as well.
I found it weird that he wouldn't turn to talk to Cherry, and I wondered "why?" but the whole event probably lasted a little more than 30 seconds. It was when when the man said "Gee, doesn't talk much..." looking towards Peach, and after I said "Yeah, she's the quiet one!" that I finally clued in to what was happening.
"Oh! She! It's a girl! I thought she was a boy!" The East Indian man said as he suddenly quit his lollygagging, and walked away.
"She's wearing mostly PINK!" I exclaimed as he walked away.
And then I almost teared up.
In a split second, I felt sad for Cherry 'cause she didn't get the attention, sad for Peach because she was adored one second, then became a whole lot less important as soon as her sex was discovered, and then, I felt sad for over half of the population of India.
I adore my girls. In fact, I'm glad I had girls instead of boys. (Not that I have anything against boys.... except for the pee thing.) And I cannot even imagine living in a world where raising a daughter is "like watering a neighbour's garden".*
We're lucky where we live. Women on this continent may still have a ways to go until we will be earning the same wages for the same work done as men, and may struggle with other inequalities, but at least we're not second class citizens. And I really shouldn't have been bothered by that man's reaction, but I just couldn't help it.
My girls could have been born in any country, to any set of parents, but they were born here and to me, and I adore them. They are important. They are NOT any less important than any boy. And I intend to let them know that as they grow up!
*This is a paraphrase and translation of an Indian saying.
As soon as we walked through the door, the greeter started telling my girls how beautiful they were. This old grandfatherly type of guy went on to ask Cherry about her Hallowe'en costume and sort of kept the girls engaged while I waited to use the bank machine. (It wasn't creepy in the slightest, just so that's clear.)
And then, throughout the store, other customers would say "hi" and tell them they were cute and or beautiful, etc.
Then, this one man came up to the kids and started talking to Peach. He was asking her how she was, and telling me how beautiful my baby was, and how "good" my baby was. During all this time, Cherry was saying "Hi! I'm (insert real name here)!" and was trying to get his attention too. He was completely ignoring Cherry. She's sort of use to this, because Peach is the BABY, so she gets a little more attention, but in general, the person doing the gawking will turn to pay attention to Cherry after a few seconds. Well, not in this case. The man didn't turn towards my sweet pigtailed little girl who was dying for attention as well.
I found it weird that he wouldn't turn to talk to Cherry, and I wondered "why?" but the whole event probably lasted a little more than 30 seconds. It was when when the man said "Gee, doesn't talk much..." looking towards Peach, and after I said "Yeah, she's the quiet one!" that I finally clued in to what was happening.
"Oh! She! It's a girl! I thought she was a boy!" The East Indian man said as he suddenly quit his lollygagging, and walked away.
"She's wearing mostly PINK!" I exclaimed as he walked away.
And then I almost teared up.
In a split second, I felt sad for Cherry 'cause she didn't get the attention, sad for Peach because she was adored one second, then became a whole lot less important as soon as her sex was discovered, and then, I felt sad for over half of the population of India.
I adore my girls. In fact, I'm glad I had girls instead of boys. (Not that I have anything against boys.... except for the pee thing.) And I cannot even imagine living in a world where raising a daughter is "like watering a neighbour's garden".*
We're lucky where we live. Women on this continent may still have a ways to go until we will be earning the same wages for the same work done as men, and may struggle with other inequalities, but at least we're not second class citizens. And I really shouldn't have been bothered by that man's reaction, but I just couldn't help it.
My girls could have been born in any country, to any set of parents, but they were born here and to me, and I adore them. They are important. They are NOT any less important than any boy. And I intend to let them know that as they grow up!
*This is a paraphrase and translation of an Indian saying.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Whew...
Oh, I'm so glad the conflict is over! My SIL and I talked it over, and everything is cool.
Turns out that *I* was more the crazy one than her. (Not that that surprises me or anything.)
Turns out she was more mad that the blog was a secret, and there was the THOUGHT that I could be writing something bad about her rather than her actually reading anything that upset her.
And on MY end, I was getting really upset because she wasn't answering any of the messages I was sending her online, and I was thinking worse case scenario that she totally hated me and that the kids would lose their relationships and the whole nine yards. Turns out that her computer AT HOME was automatically signing her into the messaging program, and she wasn't getting the messages on her laptop she's using at her mother's house.
Armondo was right when he said I was making this into a bigger deal than it really was.
And I'm so glad he was!
Ciao for now. I have dishes to do.
Turns out that *I* was more the crazy one than her. (Not that that surprises me or anything.)
Turns out she was more mad that the blog was a secret, and there was the THOUGHT that I could be writing something bad about her rather than her actually reading anything that upset her.
And on MY end, I was getting really upset because she wasn't answering any of the messages I was sending her online, and I was thinking worse case scenario that she totally hated me and that the kids would lose their relationships and the whole nine yards. Turns out that her computer AT HOME was automatically signing her into the messaging program, and she wasn't getting the messages on her laptop she's using at her mother's house.
Armondo was right when he said I was making this into a bigger deal than it really was.
And I'm so glad he was!
Ciao for now. I have dishes to do.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Does this describe my blog?
According to her facebook status, my sister in law....
"is thinking of creating her own clandestine blog that is severely biased and defamatory."
My SIL has stopped talking to me. You know, the one whom I just spent the better part of a month hanging out with during my vacation. The one who has two kids the same age as mine. The one whom I drove with for two days through the majority of my province, Etc. Etc.
I don't want to get into it too much until this resolves itself, but I seriously cannot believe how crazy people can be. Armondo is going to call his mother and sister tonight to see if he can straighten things out. It, IS, of course, his fault. The funny thing is I had SUCH a great time on that trip, and I wanted to tell you all about it, but this current situation has really clouded the whole experience! Sucky.
"is thinking of creating her own clandestine blog that is severely biased and defamatory."
My SIL has stopped talking to me. You know, the one whom I just spent the better part of a month hanging out with during my vacation. The one who has two kids the same age as mine. The one whom I drove with for two days through the majority of my province, Etc. Etc.
I don't want to get into it too much until this resolves itself, but I seriously cannot believe how crazy people can be. Armondo is going to call his mother and sister tonight to see if he can straighten things out. It, IS, of course, his fault. The funny thing is I had SUCH a great time on that trip, and I wanted to tell you all about it, but this current situation has really clouded the whole experience! Sucky.
Monday, October 08, 2007
Like I need another reason to sleep!
This is too good not to blog about....
I'm having an affair.
With the man of my dreams.
Literally!
Ok, it's not just one man, but he (they) is (are) in my dreams.
I honestly enjoy being married, and I love my life (these days :P) and I wouldn't jeopardise my family for anything, but I sort of miss that "new" feeling you get when you meet a new person and fall in love. You know? The first time you hold hands, the first time you kiss, the first time you tell the other person you love them, and the feeling you get when you wait to see if they're going to return the sentiment.....
Well, it's been happening in my dreams and it's been awesome.
I have very vivid dreams. I smell, I hear, I taste, I feel. The emotions are real. I will feel happy, sad, angry, scared, hot and cold all in the same dream.
I other words, my dreams are real to me.
Some may say that dreams aren't real, (and logically, of course they aren't) but if you (I) can experience all of the same emotions and sensations in dreams, then who's to say that it's not "real"?
In other words, while I might be feeling a little "comfortable" in this marriage, I'm getting all the "excitement" I need in my dreams.
Of course, this is probably something Armondo might not find amusing, and he might even get slightly offending by this series of dreams I've been having, but I see it as a really good thing.
I cannot control what I dream, but I can control how I act in my waking hours, but as long as I'm living an exciting "night" life, I don't even have the slightest desire to try to fulfill those needs in my waking life!
"Ok, ok, get on with it already! Tell us those sexy dreams!"
Haha, ok..
So, I've had a few, but in the early hours of this morning I was having a nice one, and it CONTINUED when I had a nap this afternoon! How awesome is that?
Anyway. This nice, dark, handsome, young! guy who was sort of a mixture of Dr. Mohinder Suresh and Sayid was totally into me. He was shy at first, and didn't even want to give me his number, but before the end of the dream, I was meeting his mother. We went through all the motions of meeting each other, getting to know each other, and falling in love. But we didn't even have sex... hmmm.. sorry, I guess it wasn't that sexy of a dream... BUT TO ME IT WAS!!! ha ha. In the second installment of the dream, things weren't all that great, because somehow Armondo was on to me, and I was trying to hide it from him.. but he was also having an affair with an ex-coworker of ours. Anyway....
It was fun while it lasted, but I hope to meet my handsome Indian* hottie again tonight, or at least one more time in my night life. But then again, we've already gone through all those fun and awkward firsts, so maybe it's time for a new man ;)
And Armondo... I still love you more. You're more amazing than my night hotties, but a girl needs a little variety once in awhile, you know? Especially on these long, lonely, fall nights while you're away!
*The actor that plays Sayid is from Indian descent, and not from the Middle East like his character.
I'm having an affair.
With the man of my dreams.
Literally!
Ok, it's not just one man, but he (they) is (are) in my dreams.
I honestly enjoy being married, and I love my life (these days :P) and I wouldn't jeopardise my family for anything, but I sort of miss that "new" feeling you get when you meet a new person and fall in love. You know? The first time you hold hands, the first time you kiss, the first time you tell the other person you love them, and the feeling you get when you wait to see if they're going to return the sentiment.....
Well, it's been happening in my dreams and it's been awesome.
I have very vivid dreams. I smell, I hear, I taste, I feel. The emotions are real. I will feel happy, sad, angry, scared, hot and cold all in the same dream.
I other words, my dreams are real to me.
Some may say that dreams aren't real, (and logically, of course they aren't) but if you (I) can experience all of the same emotions and sensations in dreams, then who's to say that it's not "real"?
In other words, while I might be feeling a little "comfortable" in this marriage, I'm getting all the "excitement" I need in my dreams.
Of course, this is probably something Armondo might not find amusing, and he might even get slightly offending by this series of dreams I've been having, but I see it as a really good thing.
I cannot control what I dream, but I can control how I act in my waking hours, but as long as I'm living an exciting "night" life, I don't even have the slightest desire to try to fulfill those needs in my waking life!
"Ok, ok, get on with it already! Tell us those sexy dreams!"
Haha, ok..
So, I've had a few, but in the early hours of this morning I was having a nice one, and it CONTINUED when I had a nap this afternoon! How awesome is that?
Anyway. This nice, dark, handsome, young! guy who was sort of a mixture of Dr. Mohinder Suresh and Sayid was totally into me. He was shy at first, and didn't even want to give me his number, but before the end of the dream, I was meeting his mother. We went through all the motions of meeting each other, getting to know each other, and falling in love. But we didn't even have sex... hmmm.. sorry, I guess it wasn't that sexy of a dream... BUT TO ME IT WAS!!! ha ha. In the second installment of the dream, things weren't all that great, because somehow Armondo was on to me, and I was trying to hide it from him.. but he was also having an affair with an ex-coworker of ours. Anyway....
It was fun while it lasted, but I hope to meet my handsome Indian* hottie again tonight, or at least one more time in my night life. But then again, we've already gone through all those fun and awkward firsts, so maybe it's time for a new man ;)
And Armondo... I still love you more. You're more amazing than my night hotties, but a girl needs a little variety once in awhile, you know? Especially on these long, lonely, fall nights while you're away!
*The actor that plays Sayid is from Indian descent, and not from the Middle East like his character.
The reason.
Armondo let it "slip" that I wrote a blog under the name of "CeCe" and now some of my inlaws googled it and have this address, so that's why I have changed the accessibility. I don't know what to do now. I want to cry. I love this blog (though the lack of posting might not really reflect that) and I don't want to change my name and address, etc. I thought the name I chose for my husband was pretty clever, but google it together with "Cherry"and "Peach", and my blog is the first to pop up. So, if I start a new blog, I'll need to change my name and "Armondo" at the very least.
So, for now, it'll just be limited access. Grrr.
So, for now, it'll just be limited access. Grrr.
Hiding my blog
If you use bloglines to read this blog, you'll be able to see this message. I've changed the access to my blog. If you want to be able to read it, send me an email celenaszoo at hotmail dot com and I will either approve you or not.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
I'm still alive!
We're on vacation right now,a nd I don't have a steady internet connection, so that's why you haven't heard from me. I have a lot to say though, and I'll fill you in when I get home!
Friday, August 31, 2007
Cherry's got jokes.
This joke was told a few months ago by my precious two year old. But I forgot to write about it then, and I figured it was important to document it.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
EAT IT!!!!
The joke has now morphed into:
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
BANANA CHEEKS!!
Knock knock
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
EAT IT!!!!
The joke has now morphed into:
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
BANANA CHEEKS!!
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
My Baby *sniff* (updated)
From the moment I got pregnant with Cherry, I knew that if I had a girl, I would wait as long as humanly possible to cut her hair. My plan was to wait until she asked to get it cut. After being a regular reader of Belinda's blog, and noticing that she hadn't cut her daughter's hair until she was three years old, I was adamant that I was going wait and to do the same thing.
Until recently. When I noticed a bunch of split ends. In Cherry's baby fine hair. SPLIT ENDS! NOOOOO!
At the time, Armondo and I were cuddled with her in her bed reading a bedtime story. I said out loud how I noticed she needed a cut, and I started quietly whining to Armondo about how much I really didn't want to do that!
But then I asked Cherry if she wanted a hair cut.
Her answer: "LET'S GO!"
"Ha ha, sorry sweety, not right now! You have to go to bed now; we'll do it another day!"
That was a couple of weeks ago, and every day I've brushed her hair and almost shed tears thinking about losing her baby curls.
To me, it's more than just the curls though. It's the "baby" part. Because I had Peach so soon after Cherry, Cherry didn't have much time to be the "baby". She was out of her crib early, (partially due to the baby coming, partially due to the fact that she's CRAZY and would climb everything and was thisclose to being able to climb out of the crib.) She had her jolly jumper and swing taken away early (more because we were trying to sell the house, and our realtor told us to get them out of the way.) and I put away all of the "baby" toys on her first birthday when I replaced them all with toddler toys. (Those baby toys will be leaving the house soon all together, because honestly, I can't stand them, so Peach will be deprived of her baby toys soon too!)
Cherry was also a pretty early walker, and was fearless from day one. I wouldn't go so far as to say that she's "gifted" or a child genius, but she's always been able to talk circles around kids her age. Those two factors, combined with her being tall, have also made her less of a baby to me.
The only thing left that was "baby" was her curls. And I was so sad thinking about them being cut off. Even if she had a rat's nest mullet.
But today was the day.
Getting up onto the big chair.
This is actually a look of excitement, not fear.
"So, what do you want me to do, exactly?"
"Umm.. she has split ends, and I really don't want you to cut off her curls, but *sniff* if that's all you can do, then *sniff* I guess that's ok."
"Well, I can just take a little bit off. I don't have to take off that much."
"*sniff* ok, just do what you have to do!"
The little sister, waiting patiently.
NOT sitting still. Not even for a sucker. But not freaking out either.
Still waiting....
And Voila! All done. Still mullety....
But she still has curls!!! I big puffy heart the hair dresser!
And Cherry was so happy with her sucker, her new weird comb thing, and her new "hair tut" that she did a little pigeon toed dance for everyone in the waiting area!
Until recently. When I noticed a bunch of split ends. In Cherry's baby fine hair. SPLIT ENDS! NOOOOO!
At the time, Armondo and I were cuddled with her in her bed reading a bedtime story. I said out loud how I noticed she needed a cut, and I started quietly whining to Armondo about how much I really didn't want to do that!
But then I asked Cherry if she wanted a hair cut.
Her answer: "LET'S GO!"
"Ha ha, sorry sweety, not right now! You have to go to bed now; we'll do it another day!"
That was a couple of weeks ago, and every day I've brushed her hair and almost shed tears thinking about losing her baby curls.
To me, it's more than just the curls though. It's the "baby" part. Because I had Peach so soon after Cherry, Cherry didn't have much time to be the "baby". She was out of her crib early, (partially due to the baby coming, partially due to the fact that she's CRAZY and would climb everything and was thisclose to being able to climb out of the crib.) She had her jolly jumper and swing taken away early (more because we were trying to sell the house, and our realtor told us to get them out of the way.) and I put away all of the "baby" toys on her first birthday when I replaced them all with toddler toys. (Those baby toys will be leaving the house soon all together, because honestly, I can't stand them, so Peach will be deprived of her baby toys soon too!)
Cherry was also a pretty early walker, and was fearless from day one. I wouldn't go so far as to say that she's "gifted" or a child genius, but she's always been able to talk circles around kids her age. Those two factors, combined with her being tall, have also made her less of a baby to me.
The only thing left that was "baby" was her curls. And I was so sad thinking about them being cut off. Even if she had a rat's nest mullet.
But today was the day.
Getting up onto the big chair.
This is actually a look of excitement, not fear.
"So, what do you want me to do, exactly?""Umm.. she has split ends, and I really don't want you to cut off her curls, but *sniff* if that's all you can do, then *sniff* I guess that's ok."
"Well, I can just take a little bit off. I don't have to take off that much."
"*sniff* ok, just do what you have to do!"
The little sister, waiting patiently.
NOT sitting still. Not even for a sucker. But not freaking out either.
Still waiting....
And Voila! All done. Still mullety....
But she still has curls!!! I big puffy heart the hair dresser!
And Cherry was so happy with her sucker, her new weird comb thing, and her new "hair tut" that she did a little pigeon toed dance for everyone in the waiting area!And in the end, I survived. And I didn't actually cry. Mostly. And, actually once it completely dried, it actually looked quite cute. Even if it IS still a mullet. Poor kid.
Oh yeah, and Cherry did fine too.
ETA: Now, the day after, I LOVE the haircut! It's so cute! And she had random comments on it today when we were out. The curls and waves are adorable! Getting her hair cut was a GREAT IDEA! Ha ha
Oh yeah, and Cherry did fine too.
ETA: Now, the day after, I LOVE the haircut! It's so cute! And she had random comments on it today when we were out. The curls and waves are adorable! Getting her hair cut was a GREAT IDEA! Ha ha
Monday, August 27, 2007
My Cycle.
Motivation.
It eludes me.
My house depresses me when it's messy.
But I'm too depressed to clean.
Which makes me less motivated.
Which makes me tired.
But I can't go to sleep because my house is messy.
So, I stay on the computer until it's late.
Doing nothing.
While my house stays messy.
Then I go to bed.
And I take a long time to fall asleep.
Because my house is messy.
And then I get up in the morning.
And I don't want to leave the house.
Because I don't want to get dressed.
Because I should clean the house.
And I don't want to clean in my nice clothes.
So I don't get dressed.
But I stay in my pjs.
Which makes me feel lazy.
So I don't clean my house.
Which makes me depressed.
So, after nap, I try to clean.
But the kids are cranky.
Which makes me irritable.
Which angers me.
And then I feel depressed because I'm a bad mother.
So, I start thinking positive thoughts.
"I AM a good mother."
"I CAN clean this house."
But the kids don't stop yelling and crying.
So, I get nothing done.
Then the kids' bedtime arrives.
And then, I need two hours to decompress.
And I feel too tired to clean.
BUT...
Last night I cleaned. Because I had guests arriving today.
And then, I cleaned more after nap time.
And, tonight after the kids went to bed, I only took half an hour to decompress, then, I was about to blog, with the thought of cleaning up later, but then I realized I wanted to watch Canadian Idol later. So I got off my ass and cleaned up the kitchen until Canadian Idol came on, and now I'm blogging at the same time as the show is on.
The house is tidy, vacuumed, the kitchen is clean!
And damn it, I feel great.
It eludes me.
My house depresses me when it's messy.
But I'm too depressed to clean.
Which makes me less motivated.
Which makes me tired.
But I can't go to sleep because my house is messy.
So, I stay on the computer until it's late.
Doing nothing.
While my house stays messy.
Then I go to bed.
And I take a long time to fall asleep.
Because my house is messy.
And then I get up in the morning.
And I don't want to leave the house.
Because I don't want to get dressed.
Because I should clean the house.
And I don't want to clean in my nice clothes.
So I don't get dressed.
But I stay in my pjs.
Which makes me feel lazy.
So I don't clean my house.
Which makes me depressed.
So, after nap, I try to clean.
But the kids are cranky.
Which makes me irritable.
Which angers me.
And then I feel depressed because I'm a bad mother.
So, I start thinking positive thoughts.
"I AM a good mother."
"I CAN clean this house."
But the kids don't stop yelling and crying.
So, I get nothing done.
Then the kids' bedtime arrives.
And then, I need two hours to decompress.
And I feel too tired to clean.
BUT...
Last night I cleaned. Because I had guests arriving today.
And then, I cleaned more after nap time.
And, tonight after the kids went to bed, I only took half an hour to decompress, then, I was about to blog, with the thought of cleaning up later, but then I realized I wanted to watch Canadian Idol later. So I got off my ass and cleaned up the kitchen until Canadian Idol came on, and now I'm blogging at the same time as the show is on.
The house is tidy, vacuumed, the kitchen is clean!
And damn it, I feel great.
Friday, August 24, 2007
Summer is Almost Over!
I've been having a great summer!
Cherry turned two, and had a blast during both her friends and family parties. She's also been to several other kids' parties this summer and asks to go to dirday parties all the time. She also knows "Happy Birthday" both in English and in Spanish (Thanks Dora) and sings them all the time.
Besides partying all the time, we have also gone camping and made a couple of road trips up island to visit with good friends. There have been trips to Grandma's house in there as well, and a trip to the west coast to drop Armondo off to the boat once. A lot of people from out of town have been around here and there too, and we had fun the other day watching some friends turned tourists bungee jump.
And, speaking of Armondo... I'm pretty sure this has been his best summer as far as work goes, as he has only worked NINE DAYS so far. He's got himself on this other boat, which does shorter trips, and he got a HUGE raise. (Same company, different boss.) He'll be going out again in a few days, for a bit of a long trip. (Because he's been home so much, I haven't been blogging much. He gives me a hard time for being on the computer "all the time". So, lately I've just been doing short stints on Facebook here and there, and checking my email.)
The best part of this summer though:
I fell in love with my husband again.
Somewhere along the line, I had fallen out of love with him. Maybe it was boredom, maybe it was the extended absences, maybe it was my depression, maybe it was the little irritating things he does, maybe it was the lack of sleep.... I don't know what caused me to stop loving him, but I did.
When he was gone for long stretches, I would miss him, but more than that I resented him. When he was home, I was happy he was here for the girls, but I was so overly irritated by the extra mess he made, how much he "screwed up" our schedule, and how he kept on missing the toilet when he peed. IT'S A HUGE FREAKING TARGET!!!! He couldn't do anything right. I wasn't interested in sex, and I was cringing when he touched me. I knew I was feeling a little "off" towards him, and credited it to having a new born, and being busy and tired, but when we got away for 24hours to a spa resort sans kids, and I STILL didn't feel any good feelings towards him, I knew there was something wrong.
But I waited until we were home to talk about it with him.
The talk was horrible. I mean, I just came out and told him I thought that I didn't love him anymore. He was crushed. He was ready to quit his job right then and there. He cried. I cried. I told him that I couldn't guarantee that him quitting the fishing job would fix the problem, and I didn't even know if it was the problem to begin with. He told me he thought of me as a goddess, and told me that I was the most important thing to him.
I told him I wasn't going anywhere. That this was the "for worse" part of our vows, and that I meant every word of my vows. I also told him a saying that I had heard recently that went something like this: the secret to a long marriage is to never have both partners fall out of love at the same time.
He was pretty sweet during the talk, but he was upset. The next day he was a complete asshole.
The next few weeks were spent doing all the fun stuff I mentioned above. During that time, he also built the kids a totally awesome playhouse/swing set.
And it was during that time that I fell back in love with him. It sounds like I'm very fickle, but I don't see it that way.
During those weeks he had off, I watched him have fun. I watched him get really enthusiastic about the playhouse he was building. I watched him draw plan, after plan, and then watched him execute his plan. I watched him at the beach with the kids picking up crabs and showing them to Cherry. I watched him play with Annie and wrestle her to the ground.
I saw the man I fell in love with in the first place. His stresses were mostly left behind on the boat, and besides the new stress I put on him, he was pretty well carefree.
That, and he really, really tried to win me back. He didn't shower me with gifts, or do anything particularly special, but he upped the respect level. And so did I.
We both started to talk to each other with nicer tones. We both listened better. He flirted with me more. I made the conscious effort to be a better wife, and he made the effort to be a better husband.
The day before he left for his nine day fishing trip, I told him I had fallen for him again. And he got angry! It totally wasn't the reaction I was expecting, but I also didn't really know what I actually was expecting. He was pissed off that I decided to tell him the day before he was leaving. I thought it was best for me to tell him, so he would KNOW while he was gone that his wife was at home waiting for him, and loving him.
He made me cry.
Later that night, I explained to him how watching him have so much passion for the swing set was really what got me overall. About how when I first met him, he was making sushi, and even though the particular job wasn't all that great, he just had so much passion for the art form of sushi making. He took so much pride in his work. And when he switched careers, he lost that. He lost his passion. He lost his confidence. But, seeing him find that again was totally amazing.
That, and the fact that we both started being nicer to each other.
Since he got back from that nine day fishing trip, things have been great with us. The s3x has been fabulous, the respect level is way up, his hot and hard fishing muscles turn me on, and it's all good.
So many people seem to give up on marriage so easily. I've known people who would have given up if they were in my situation, but I take our union seriously, and I'm so glad that we were able to work it all out.
Because I love him more now than I did on my wedding day.
Even if he does still miss the toilet sometimes.
Cherry turned two, and had a blast during both her friends and family parties. She's also been to several other kids' parties this summer and asks to go to dirday parties all the time. She also knows "Happy Birthday" both in English and in Spanish (Thanks Dora) and sings them all the time.
Besides partying all the time, we have also gone camping and made a couple of road trips up island to visit with good friends. There have been trips to Grandma's house in there as well, and a trip to the west coast to drop Armondo off to the boat once. A lot of people from out of town have been around here and there too, and we had fun the other day watching some friends turned tourists bungee jump.
And, speaking of Armondo... I'm pretty sure this has been his best summer as far as work goes, as he has only worked NINE DAYS so far. He's got himself on this other boat, which does shorter trips, and he got a HUGE raise. (Same company, different boss.) He'll be going out again in a few days, for a bit of a long trip. (Because he's been home so much, I haven't been blogging much. He gives me a hard time for being on the computer "all the time". So, lately I've just been doing short stints on Facebook here and there, and checking my email.)
The best part of this summer though:
I fell in love with my husband again.
Somewhere along the line, I had fallen out of love with him. Maybe it was boredom, maybe it was the extended absences, maybe it was my depression, maybe it was the little irritating things he does, maybe it was the lack of sleep.... I don't know what caused me to stop loving him, but I did.
When he was gone for long stretches, I would miss him, but more than that I resented him. When he was home, I was happy he was here for the girls, but I was so overly irritated by the extra mess he made, how much he "screwed up" our schedule, and how he kept on missing the toilet when he peed. IT'S A HUGE FREAKING TARGET!!!! He couldn't do anything right. I wasn't interested in sex, and I was cringing when he touched me. I knew I was feeling a little "off" towards him, and credited it to having a new born, and being busy and tired, but when we got away for 24hours to a spa resort sans kids, and I STILL didn't feel any good feelings towards him, I knew there was something wrong.
But I waited until we were home to talk about it with him.
The talk was horrible. I mean, I just came out and told him I thought that I didn't love him anymore. He was crushed. He was ready to quit his job right then and there. He cried. I cried. I told him that I couldn't guarantee that him quitting the fishing job would fix the problem, and I didn't even know if it was the problem to begin with. He told me he thought of me as a goddess, and told me that I was the most important thing to him.
I told him I wasn't going anywhere. That this was the "for worse" part of our vows, and that I meant every word of my vows. I also told him a saying that I had heard recently that went something like this: the secret to a long marriage is to never have both partners fall out of love at the same time.
He was pretty sweet during the talk, but he was upset. The next day he was a complete asshole.
The next few weeks were spent doing all the fun stuff I mentioned above. During that time, he also built the kids a totally awesome playhouse/swing set.
And it was during that time that I fell back in love with him. It sounds like I'm very fickle, but I don't see it that way.
During those weeks he had off, I watched him have fun. I watched him get really enthusiastic about the playhouse he was building. I watched him draw plan, after plan, and then watched him execute his plan. I watched him at the beach with the kids picking up crabs and showing them to Cherry. I watched him play with Annie and wrestle her to the ground.
I saw the man I fell in love with in the first place. His stresses were mostly left behind on the boat, and besides the new stress I put on him, he was pretty well carefree.
That, and he really, really tried to win me back. He didn't shower me with gifts, or do anything particularly special, but he upped the respect level. And so did I.
We both started to talk to each other with nicer tones. We both listened better. He flirted with me more. I made the conscious effort to be a better wife, and he made the effort to be a better husband.
The day before he left for his nine day fishing trip, I told him I had fallen for him again. And he got angry! It totally wasn't the reaction I was expecting, but I also didn't really know what I actually was expecting. He was pissed off that I decided to tell him the day before he was leaving. I thought it was best for me to tell him, so he would KNOW while he was gone that his wife was at home waiting for him, and loving him.
He made me cry.
Later that night, I explained to him how watching him have so much passion for the swing set was really what got me overall. About how when I first met him, he was making sushi, and even though the particular job wasn't all that great, he just had so much passion for the art form of sushi making. He took so much pride in his work. And when he switched careers, he lost that. He lost his passion. He lost his confidence. But, seeing him find that again was totally amazing.
That, and the fact that we both started being nicer to each other.
Since he got back from that nine day fishing trip, things have been great with us. The s3x has been fabulous, the respect level is way up, his hot and hard fishing muscles turn me on, and it's all good.
So many people seem to give up on marriage so easily. I've known people who would have given up if they were in my situation, but I take our union seriously, and I'm so glad that we were able to work it all out.
Because I love him more now than I did on my wedding day.
Even if he does still miss the toilet sometimes.
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Cherry's "E I O Dirday Party!"
She has been begging for a barnyard themed birthday party for months, and this is the result. (Her actual birthday and the family party are tomorrow.)
Cherry playing in the hay pile. I hid a bunch of toys in the pile, and all the kids searched through it to find the prizes. One other adult, Cherry, and I, all had allergic reactions to all the hay being thrown around by the kids. All three of us took benedryl to get over it, and I managed to get by relatively unscathed, but my friend ended up almost passing out due to the drugs, and Cherry ended up with hives on her cheeks. And she's off today with Armondo to get her 2 year portraits done. She had marks on her face for the last set of portraits done with the cousins at Easter! Oh well!
Armondo and I drew pig and cow faces on balloons, and had the kids "herd" them into the barn I made out of a fridge box.
This is Cherry waiting for her cake as we all sang Happy Birthday. She's watched so much TV that she knew exactly what was happening and was very good at sitting still!
In fact, she has seen so much tv that she knew to blow out the candle without being told to! (No, I am not proud of the fact that my child watches so much TV. But when Armondo is gone for weeks at a time, it's pretty much my only saving grace, and the only way to get her to be calm for awhile so that I can cook or clean or poop. She watches much less TV when Armondo is home.)
A close up of one of the "pig" cupcakes I made. The other ones were cows and sheep, but really, only the pigs looked all that great. I made the cake and the frosting from scratch! Overall, it didn't taste all that great, but I'm still proud that I put all that effort in. Next time the cake and frosting are coming from a box. Cheaper and faster, and will leave more time for decorating.
Cherry eating her pig. She only ate the frosting. Her nose is running from the hay inhalation.
Some of the other kids eating.
The "akk, the sun is in our eyes, and dang it, I still have my pig ears on" family shot in front of the barn I made.
She has been begging for a barnyard themed birthday party for months, and this is the result. (Her actual birthday and the family party are tomorrow.)
Cherry playing in the hay pile. I hid a bunch of toys in the pile, and all the kids searched through it to find the prizes. One other adult, Cherry, and I, all had allergic reactions to all the hay being thrown around by the kids. All three of us took benedryl to get over it, and I managed to get by relatively unscathed, but my friend ended up almost passing out due to the drugs, and Cherry ended up with hives on her cheeks. And she's off today with Armondo to get her 2 year portraits done. She had marks on her face for the last set of portraits done with the cousins at Easter! Oh well!
Armondo and I drew pig and cow faces on balloons, and had the kids "herd" them into the barn I made out of a fridge box.
This is Cherry waiting for her cake as we all sang Happy Birthday. She's watched so much TV that she knew exactly what was happening and was very good at sitting still!
In fact, she has seen so much tv that she knew to blow out the candle without being told to! (No, I am not proud of the fact that my child watches so much TV. But when Armondo is gone for weeks at a time, it's pretty much my only saving grace, and the only way to get her to be calm for awhile so that I can cook or clean or poop. She watches much less TV when Armondo is home.)
A close up of one of the "pig" cupcakes I made. The other ones were cows and sheep, but really, only the pigs looked all that great. I made the cake and the frosting from scratch! Overall, it didn't taste all that great, but I'm still proud that I put all that effort in. Next time the cake and frosting are coming from a box. Cheaper and faster, and will leave more time for decorating.
Cherry eating her pig. She only ate the frosting. Her nose is running from the hay inhalation.
Some of the other kids eating.
The "akk, the sun is in our eyes, and dang it, I still have my pig ears on" family shot in front of the barn I made.
For some reason, blogger won't let me put a title in! This is just a quick catch up post, to be followed by a photo post of Cherry's second birthday party!
I'm doing a bit better. The meds are helping with my PPD. Some days it's still hard to get out of bed, especially on days that I don't have any real plans or "purpose" to my day. Luckily, I've been really busy lately, so there haven't been many of those days!
Armondo has been home for awhile now. When he first came home, we had a few days of awkwardness as we worked through some issues. Things were starting to get bad between us, but I think we were able to really talk through what was bothering us, and I can say that both of us are making an effort to be better towards each other. There's no need for me to go into detail, or even record what was going on, 'cause it's just water under the bridge now. Re hashing it might just bring up bad feelings.
I've been reaching out and making more friends who have kids. I was really worried that by the time that Cherry's birthday party occurred, that there wouldn't be any children there for her! But somehow, I was able to make enough friends in a short period of time in order to have a relatively large party for her. It's funny how in high school, you strive to have friends and be somewhat popular, just so you don't feel like an idiot, then you have a few years off after school where you can just pick and choose who you want to hang out with, and it doesn't really matter, but then you have kids, and all of a sudden you have to make friends again so that THEY have friends!
Peach is still pretty much a cute little lump who doesn't do that much. She's almost 6 months old, is signing for milk, is smiling lots, loves her sister, and is almost getting teeth. I can't leave her alone on any "surface" anymore, 'cause she can scoot right off, but I think it'll be a little while until she's crawling.
Cherry is full of funny phrases. She's full of "I wuv you"s and "What zat noise?"es. She is a never ending chatterbox, and is very polite. Lots of please and thank yous and excuse mes. She now know her basic shapes, and can count to ten with some prompting. She loves to sing and will often mix her favourite songs together into a cute medley. She also sings songs about her sister. There's this TV show we watch about a bunny, and the lyrics to the opening go like this: "Miffy, cute little bunny, Miffy, smart little bunny," etc. Well, ever since Cherry was about a year old, we've been replacing "Miffy" with Cherry's name and "bunny" with "baby." Well, now Cherry will sing the song replacing "Miffy" with "DeDe" (the nickname she calls her sister) and will sing "DeDe, cute little baby!"
And umm.. let's not talk about potty training. 'Cause it's not happening. And there's nothing to talk about. Cherry's going to be in diapers until she's 12.
And with that, I will end this post and start posting the birthday party photos.
I'm doing a bit better. The meds are helping with my PPD. Some days it's still hard to get out of bed, especially on days that I don't have any real plans or "purpose" to my day. Luckily, I've been really busy lately, so there haven't been many of those days!
Armondo has been home for awhile now. When he first came home, we had a few days of awkwardness as we worked through some issues. Things were starting to get bad between us, but I think we were able to really talk through what was bothering us, and I can say that both of us are making an effort to be better towards each other. There's no need for me to go into detail, or even record what was going on, 'cause it's just water under the bridge now. Re hashing it might just bring up bad feelings.
I've been reaching out and making more friends who have kids. I was really worried that by the time that Cherry's birthday party occurred, that there wouldn't be any children there for her! But somehow, I was able to make enough friends in a short period of time in order to have a relatively large party for her. It's funny how in high school, you strive to have friends and be somewhat popular, just so you don't feel like an idiot, then you have a few years off after school where you can just pick and choose who you want to hang out with, and it doesn't really matter, but then you have kids, and all of a sudden you have to make friends again so that THEY have friends!
Peach is still pretty much a cute little lump who doesn't do that much. She's almost 6 months old, is signing for milk, is smiling lots, loves her sister, and is almost getting teeth. I can't leave her alone on any "surface" anymore, 'cause she can scoot right off, but I think it'll be a little while until she's crawling.
Cherry is full of funny phrases. She's full of "I wuv you"s and "What zat noise?"es. She is a never ending chatterbox, and is very polite. Lots of please and thank yous and excuse mes. She now know her basic shapes, and can count to ten with some prompting. She loves to sing and will often mix her favourite songs together into a cute medley. She also sings songs about her sister. There's this TV show we watch about a bunny, and the lyrics to the opening go like this: "Miffy, cute little bunny, Miffy, smart little bunny," etc. Well, ever since Cherry was about a year old, we've been replacing "Miffy" with Cherry's name and "bunny" with "baby." Well, now Cherry will sing the song replacing "Miffy" with "DeDe" (the nickname she calls her sister) and will sing "DeDe, cute little baby!"
And umm.. let's not talk about potty training. 'Cause it's not happening. And there's nothing to talk about. Cherry's going to be in diapers until she's 12.
And with that, I will end this post and start posting the birthday party photos.
Saturday, June 16, 2007
I am SO lucky.
My house is a disaster. But only because I'm lucky enough to have children to make it that way.
I am completely sleep deprived. But that's because I have two beautiful children who make me that way.
I got a case of Post Partum Depression. But I wouldn't have it if I didn't have my lovely girls.
I miss my husband. But I only miss him so much because he really is quite wonderful.
My house requires so many repairs and cosmetic upgrades. But only because I'm lucky enough to own a house.
I could keep on going, but I have a house to clean!
Some days you just need to take inventory to realize just how lucky you really are.
I am completely sleep deprived. But that's because I have two beautiful children who make me that way.
I got a case of Post Partum Depression. But I wouldn't have it if I didn't have my lovely girls.
I miss my husband. But I only miss him so much because he really is quite wonderful.
My house requires so many repairs and cosmetic upgrades. But only because I'm lucky enough to own a house.
I could keep on going, but I have a house to clean!
Some days you just need to take inventory to realize just how lucky you really are.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
I DARE YOU!
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Cuddle Time.
This heat and the long days is making regular bed times an impossibility. Last night Peach woke up at about 10:30 and refused to go back to sleep until 1am. I blame the heat and all the sweat she woke up drenched in. Cherry has been going to her ROOM at her regular 7pm bedtime, but hasn't gone to sleep before 9:30pm in several days. She's usually happy to just play and sing quietly in her room until she falls asleep. But sometimes, she sort of gets a little out of hand when she trashes her room.
That's right, she's sleeping UNDER her mattress, and is using her blanket as a pillow. When I went in there and removed the mattress from her, and put it back on her bed, she very quietly woke up, said "Thank you mommy" in the cutest little voice and crawled onto her bed and went back to sleep.
Tonight (Saturday night) she wasn't so happy just playing in her room and trashing it quietly. Tonight she was upset because she was "all wet mommy." (Covered in sweat). So, I asked her if she wanted to cuddle. (I know, cuddling doesn't exactly solve the sweat problem, but I thought it would make her feel better, and I don't really get much alone time with either one of my kids, so I thought I'd take advantage of the situation.)
She was super excited about cuddling, and so was I, really, 'cause it's only been a few months now that she's actually let me cuddle with her since she was a little baby. And I mean REALLY cuddle. And she's not shy about the kisses now either, which is excellent!
ANYWAY... we cuddled for awhile, but she was no where near ready to go to sleep, and after several rounds of "I love you"s and talking about how much fun we had at the beach today, I decided it was time to go to sleep. So, I rolled over and pretended to sleep, complete with full out fake snoring. Cherry tried EVERYTHING to get my attention. She was calling out "Mommy, mommy, I love you!" and stroking my hair and everything. It was very cute, and I did an EXCELLENT job at continuing to fake snore and not crack a smile.
But then she got me.
When she knocked on my head and said....
"Knock, knock, Helllooooo? Anybody home?"
I totally cracked up laughing, which sent her into a fit of laughter, which turned into a tornado of kisses.
Then she let me tuck her in and she went right to sleep.
Aww, I love being a mom.
That's right, she's sleeping UNDER her mattress, and is using her blanket as a pillow. When I went in there and removed the mattress from her, and put it back on her bed, she very quietly woke up, said "Thank you mommy" in the cutest little voice and crawled onto her bed and went back to sleep.
Tonight (Saturday night) she wasn't so happy just playing in her room and trashing it quietly. Tonight she was upset because she was "all wet mommy." (Covered in sweat). So, I asked her if she wanted to cuddle. (I know, cuddling doesn't exactly solve the sweat problem, but I thought it would make her feel better, and I don't really get much alone time with either one of my kids, so I thought I'd take advantage of the situation.)
She was super excited about cuddling, and so was I, really, 'cause it's only been a few months now that she's actually let me cuddle with her since she was a little baby. And I mean REALLY cuddle. And she's not shy about the kisses now either, which is excellent!
ANYWAY... we cuddled for awhile, but she was no where near ready to go to sleep, and after several rounds of "I love you"s and talking about how much fun we had at the beach today, I decided it was time to go to sleep. So, I rolled over and pretended to sleep, complete with full out fake snoring. Cherry tried EVERYTHING to get my attention. She was calling out "Mommy, mommy, I love you!" and stroking my hair and everything. It was very cute, and I did an EXCELLENT job at continuing to fake snore and not crack a smile.
But then she got me.
When she knocked on my head and said....
"Knock, knock, Helllooooo? Anybody home?"
I totally cracked up laughing, which sent her into a fit of laughter, which turned into a tornado of kisses.
Then she let me tuck her in and she went right to sleep.
Aww, I love being a mom.
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